Two Beers By Campfire Most Effective Medication to Cure Insomnia — The Betoota Advocate

Two Beers By Campfire Most Effective Medication to Cure Insomnia — The Betoota Advocate


A highly strung city corporate is learning about the benefits of the outback this evening, struggling to keep his eyes open in front of a crackling campfire.

After spending the last 11 years of his working life glued to an office computer and stressing about meeting his monthly finance targets, local insomniac Garth Armstrong is understood to be minutes away from falling asleep in his camp chair. 

Making the brave decision to skip another weekend hopscotching the city, and instead venture to a campground on the edge of Betoota Dams, the 38 year-old is believed to be enjoying the euphoric feeling of getting a little pissed and gazing deep into the flickering flames of the ‘Bush TV’.

Swirling the final warm dregs of a second Betoota Bitter and gulping them down without a care, Garth told our reporter through sleepy slurred speech that he was pretty keen on this whole camping business.

“Ahhhh, yeahhh, how’s the serenity…”

“It’s pretty good out here hey…”

Allowing himself the pleasure of dropping two notches on his belt buckle, Garth told our reporter after gorging himself on a BBQ cooked steak, a scoop of pasta salad and half a kilo of potato bake, he was pretty close to hitting the hay.

Relatively new to the camping lifestyle, Garth is reported to have only recently kitted out his Mazda CX-7 with a soft shell rooftop tent, in the hope of spending more weekends avoiding the city rat race and enjoying the great outdoors.

After slowly computing that he’d need to trek to the caravan park bathrooms to take a leak before climbing up a ladder into his tent, Garth appeared to settle deeper into his new reclining camp chair, and ponder cracking a third beer.

“Yeah, I’m not quite ready to get up yet, you know what I might just fall asleep here.”

“Stick a fork in me, I’m done…”

Author: Stephen Bailey