ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
The unsinkable Barnaby Joyce is shearing at the moment and the former Deputy Prime Minister was seen classing his own wool for the first time in years, thanks largely to his newfound freedom and escape from the dreaded Canberra Bubble.
However, things weren’t going to plan for the 55-year-old New Englishman.
The years spent living and working for the Australian people have meant Barnaby hasn’t been around to conduct proper animal husbandry and he told The Advocate a short time ago via wireless telephone that he fears this year’s wool cheque will reflect that.
“Ah mate, well, you know it’s not going to be flash when you’ve got 24 [micron] coming off the back of your Merino hoggets,” he said.
“Don’t think much of that will end up as cable-knit jumpers down at Pursegloves. Or even Blowes for that matter. Anything over 24 and it’ll be bloody woven into carpet for some rich sheila’s dog down in Double Bay to piss on. Tell you what, it might not even be worth even taking the cross-bred fleece to market at this rate,”
“They’re full of burs, too. I didn’t get around to spraying and slashing much last year and tell you what, it shows. On top of that, bloody Qantas lost my paddock book over the Christmas break and I sort of lost track of where everything was. By lost, I mean I left it tucked in the seat in front of me and when I called up to see if they had it, they said they didn’t. Pretty hard to believe when there’s only 12 business class seats inside the big red and white sky bus but it is what it is,”
“But I’m in the same boat as a lot of graziers at the moment. What with China playing hardball with us ‘Thanks Albo!’ and the Italians not making many suits right now on count of the market correction and whatnot. We had a good strike rate with the first-cross ewes this year, but. Silver linings, hey,”
“It doesn’t make seeing another truck of 24-micron rubbish drive over the top ramp off the farm. Tough times ahead for Barn.”
More to come.