Tigers Encouraged To Not Fuck Up Warriors NZ Return By Actually Winning — The Betoota Advocate

Tigers Encouraged To Not Fuck Up Warriors NZ Return By Actually Winning — The Betoota Advocate

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT

Warriors fans are excited as their team will play a home game for the first time on home soil in three years.

It has long been acknowledged that the New Zealand Warriors have one of the longest-suffering fan bases in the NRL which means the fact their domestic fans have not seen them play a home game since 2019 has both eased and contributed to the pain in the fanbase

Another team with a long-suffering fanbase, the Wests Tigers have been selected to play the Warriors in their homecoming game in what might be the most thoughtful move by match selectors who usually pick the Warriors to get done by the Storm every ANZAC Day.

Now the Warriors have a real opportunity to have a strong homecoming win against the struggling Tigers, as long as the Tigers don’t Tigers fuck it up and actually beat the Warriors.

“The boys are back home!” rejoiced Warriors fan Temuera Owen, doing a great job ignoring the fact their star player won’t be there and doesn’t want to live in New Zealand.

“Unless, y’know, the obvious thing happens and the Tigers actually show up and make us look like dicks.”

While the Warriors have dealt with never winning a premiership, losing their Dally M winning fullback, being away from home for two and half years, signing Nathan Brown, and sacking Nathan Brown, Tigers fans still think they have suffered more which is exactly why they predict their team will dish up an uncharacteristic champion performance.

“Warriors fans can complain all they want but at least their children have seen them play finals,” stated Tigers fan Lincoln Manby who is so loyal to his club he’s never once won his work footy tipping.

“They don’t have management who would rather argue with a podcaster than fix their club. They don’t have an embarrassing documentary that is like a Sunderland Til I Die without any of the honesty on the internet forever. They don’t have a CEO who looks like he’d be more suited to a life of creating abstract art that’s really just a front for a money laundering and heroin ring.”

“What they do have, is a chance at a glorious return against a flabby team this Sunday which is why we are probably going to put on a masterclass.”

Author: Stephen Bailey