Tag: Power
Futuristic Power Plant That Converts Homeless People Into Green Energy Attracts Government Attention — The Betoota Advocate
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact As the Federal Government looks to help ease the national housing crisis and achieve net zero by 2030, a…
“These Will Have To Wait, Toto. We Have Power Companies To Fight” — The Betoota Advocate
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Labor MPs are being recalled from holidays this week in order for the Prime Minister to pass his landmark…
“Highlighting My Blatant, Psychopathic, Extremely Weird Abuses Of Power Is Political Intimidation” — The Betoota Advocate
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The Member for Cook has today shocked the nation by revealing that he is physically incapable of saying the word sorry. The former…
Housemates Of Taylor Swift Fan Forced To Turn Off Mains Power After A Week Of Waterboarding — The Betoota Advocate
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A share-house in South Betoota has today been forced to take drastic action. After 7 days of non-stop Taylor Swift echoing through the…
Treasurer To Spend Entire Budget Speech Explaining How His Party Weren’t In Power For Last Decade — The Betoota Advocate
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact The nation’s treasurer has today offered The Betoota Advocate some exclusive insight into what he is forecasting for the nation’s future. Treasurer Jim…
Single Blokes Link Up For Some Good Old-Fashioned Power Drinking After Rain Scares Off The Sheilas — The Betoota Advocate
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Two young fellas from our town’s vapid, soulless Heights district are set to link up tonight for some good,…
Stingy Housemate Argues Semantics Over Exact Percentage Of Power Bill He’s Responsible For — The Betoota Advocate
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Glen Mathieson (25) and his two share house companions deeply regret the day Jared Hobley (25) became their new housemate. Sure, they needed…
Indestructible Bunnings Umbrella Somehow Boasts More Longevity Than Some Of Their Power Tools — The Betoota Advocate
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A local Dad is staying today, thanks to the structural integrity of his two-year-old Bunnings umbrella. Standing on the sidelines at…
Bob Katter Tells Albanese To Just Say The Word And We Can Begin Nationalising The Energy Grids, It Can Be Swift, And It Can Be Bloodless, Unless They Want Otherwise. My Son Robbie And I Can Take Care Of Any Power Stations North Of The Brisbane Line, And Don’t You Dare Think For One Minute That The Proud People Of North Queensland Adhered To The 1996 Firearms Agreement, Because We Didn’t. We’ve Got Caches Of High-Powered Weapons Buried In Container Units Right Across The Gulf, And When We Liberate The Grid, You Can Tell Those Greedy Bastards At Telstra And The Commonwealth Bank That We’re Coming For Them Next. Australians Built These Institutions, And We Can Take Them Back, By Force If Need Be, And Let Me Just Say I Hope That It Is Needed, Because Where I’m From Snakes Get The Shovel, And If This Current Crisis Tells Us Anything, It’s That There’s A Den Of Poisonous Snakes Slithering Through Boardrooms From Brisbane To Hobart. Privatisation Serves No One But The Top End Of Town, And That’s What I’ve Been Warning These Useless Fools In Canberra For Half A Century Now. They’ve Buggered It All Up, And They Know It. Our Nation’s Greatest Assets Have Been Sold At Less Than Cost Price To The Sandstone Friends Of The Ruling Class, They’d Sell Them The ABC And Australia Post If We We Weren’t Looking. But That Ends Whenever You Say It Ends, Albanese, My Dear Friend. Let ‘Em Know We Are Ready, We’ll Take Back The TAB Too While We’re At It. Because Australians Deserve The Dignity Of Knowing That Every Time They Do Their Arse On The Punt, At Least Their Losses Are Being Spent Of Fixing Roads And Hospitals, Not Some Soul Sucking Corporate Villain’s Yacht. These Blue Blooded Cowards Thought I Was Joking When I Said Australia’s Not For Sale. Well It Isn’t, And They Can Find Out The Hard Way, If That’s What They Want.
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT In the boldest act of the new Labor Government, The Australian Energy Market Operator (AEMO) has been given full support to take the…
New Communist Government Asks The Peasants To Limit Their Power Use — The Betoota Advocate
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Just weeks after storming to power, Australia’s new communist government is asking the peasants to limit their energy use…