Katter Says He Was Completely Unaware That Anybody Had Problem With The Melbourne Cup Unless It’s Some Sort Of Intellectual Reaction To The Snobby Attitudes Of Those Patch-On-Elbow Blue Bloods At Victorian Racing I Mean It’s No Wonder These Kiwi And Arab Horses Keep Winning The Bloody Thing When There’s No Active Push To Include Homegrown Horses I Mean If You Wanna See A Real Race You Should You Head To The Windorah Gymkhana Out There In The Barcoo, Mind You She Was Lucky To Get A Start This Year Due To This Unseasonal Downfall That Always Makes It A Bit Dangerous To Be Riding Rank Station Ponies At Full Pelt In A Pair Of RMs and Molekskin Trousers, I Always Remember The First Time My Boy Robbie Tried To Jump In The Saddle For The Trot-Canter-Gallop Event When He Was A Young Fella, You See He’d Borrowed This Mare From My Mate Bucktooth Toovey Out The Back Of Isisford Anyway He’s Halfway Through This Race And Looking Alright Actually, About To Change Gears For The Sprint Until This Sand Goanna Comes Out Of Nowhere And Spooks The Poor Thing To High Heavens, My Son Robbie, Fresh From The Cowboys Young Guns Squad, After Getting Dropped For Playing Like A Girl Just Quietly, Gets Thrown Like A Cannonball Into A Crowd Of Rum-Swilling Ringers Who’d Come To Town For A Look, Well That’s What I Thought Anyway, Turns Out A Few Of Them Were What You’d Describe As Motorcycle Enthusiasts, The Type Of Blokes You’d Rather Miss And Land On A Cactus, Now Robbie Knew As Well As I Do That As A Cleanskin Politician His Old Man Can’t Be Getting Involved In Any Disputes With These Kind Of Outlaws, So I Sent In A Couple Of Brophy’s Tent Boxers Who Were Making Light Work Out Of The Shandy Bar Round The Corner, These Blokes Come Steaming Through Like The Burgess Brothers And By Joh You Shoulda Seen The Blue The Boys Put On, I Mean I Shouldn’t Laugh, But We Definitely Still Do Behind Closed Doors Over Christmas, I Had To Make A Lot Of Election Promises To Soothe Things Over With The Committee After That One But The Locals Still Reckon Those Tickets Were The Best Money Ever Spent
Posted in Uncategorized

Katter Says He Was Completely Unaware That Anybody Had Problem With The Melbourne Cup Unless It’s Some Sort Of Intellectual Reaction To The Snobby Attitudes Of Those Patch-On-Elbow Blue Bloods At Victorian Racing I Mean It’s No Wonder These Kiwi And Arab Horses Keep Winning The Bloody Thing When There’s No Active Push To Include Homegrown Horses I Mean If You Wanna See A Real Race You Should You Head To The Windorah Gymkhana Out There In The Barcoo, Mind You She Was Lucky To Get A Start This Year Due To This Unseasonal Downfall That Always Makes It A Bit Dangerous To Be Riding Rank Station Ponies At Full Pelt In A Pair Of RMs and Molekskin Trousers, I Always Remember The First Time My Boy Robbie Tried To Jump In The Saddle For The Trot-Canter-Gallop Event When He Was A Young Fella, You See He’d Borrowed This Mare From My Mate Bucktooth Toovey Out The Back Of Isisford Anyway He’s Halfway Through This Race And Looking Alright Actually, About To Change Gears For The Sprint Until This Sand Goanna Comes Out Of Nowhere And Spooks The Poor Thing To High Heavens, My Son Robbie, Fresh From The Cowboys Young Guns Squad, After Getting Dropped For Playing Like A Girl Just Quietly, Gets Thrown Like A Cannonball Into A Crowd Of Rum-Swilling Ringers Who’d Come To Town For A Look, Well That’s What I Thought Anyway, Turns Out A Few Of Them Were What You’d Describe As Motorcycle Enthusiasts, The Type Of Blokes You’d Rather Miss And Land On A Cactus, Now Robbie Knew As Well As I Do That As A Cleanskin Politician His Old Man Can’t Be Getting Involved In Any Disputes With These Kind Of Outlaws, So I Sent In A Couple Of Brophy’s Tent Boxers Who Were Making Light Work Out Of The Shandy Bar Round The Corner, These Blokes Come Steaming Through Like The Burgess Brothers And By Joh You Shoulda Seen The Blue The Boys Put On, I Mean I Shouldn’t Laugh, But We Definitely Still Do Behind Closed Doors Over Christmas, I Had To Make A Lot Of Election Promises To Soothe Things Over With The Committee After That One But The Locals Still Reckon Those Tickets Were The Best Money Ever Spent

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT With less than 24 hours until the Race That Stops The Nation, the same hashtags that once dominated social media before the pandemic…

Continue Reading Katter Says He Was Completely Unaware That Anybody Had Problem With The Melbourne Cup Unless It’s Some Sort Of Intellectual Reaction To The Snobby Attitudes Of Those Patch-On-Elbow Blue Bloods At Victorian Racing I Mean It’s No Wonder These Kiwi And Arab Horses Keep Winning The Bloody Thing When There’s No Active Push To Include Homegrown Horses I Mean If You Wanna See A Real Race You Should You Head To The Windorah Gymkhana Out There In The Barcoo, Mind You She Was Lucky To Get A Start This Year Due To This Unseasonal Downfall That Always Makes It A Bit Dangerous To Be Riding Rank Station Ponies At Full Pelt In A Pair Of RMs and Molekskin Trousers, I Always Remember The First Time My Boy Robbie Tried To Jump In The Saddle For The Trot-Canter-Gallop Event When He Was A Young Fella, You See He’d Borrowed This Mare From My Mate Bucktooth Toovey Out The Back Of Isisford Anyway He’s Halfway Through This Race And Looking Alright Actually, About To Change Gears For The Sprint Until This Sand Goanna Comes Out Of Nowhere And Spooks The Poor Thing To High Heavens, My Son Robbie, Fresh From The Cowboys Young Guns Squad, After Getting Dropped For Playing Like A Girl Just Quietly, Gets Thrown Like A Cannonball Into A Crowd Of Rum-Swilling Ringers Who’d Come To Town For A Look, Well That’s What I Thought Anyway, Turns Out A Few Of Them Were What You’d Describe As Motorcycle Enthusiasts, The Type Of Blokes You’d Rather Miss And Land On A Cactus, Now Robbie Knew As Well As I Do That As A Cleanskin Politician His Old Man Can’t Be Getting Involved In Any Disputes With These Kind Of Outlaws, So I Sent In A Couple Of Brophy’s Tent Boxers Who Were Making Light Work Out Of The Shandy Bar Round The Corner, These Blokes Come Steaming Through Like The Burgess Brothers And By Joh You Shoulda Seen The Blue The Boys Put On, I Mean I Shouldn’t Laugh, But We Definitely Still Do Behind Closed Doors Over Christmas, I Had To Make A Lot Of Election Promises To Soothe Things Over With The Committee After That One But The Locals Still Reckon Those Tickets Were The Best Money Ever Spent
Rugby's Marketing Pigeon Assures Boss That Punters Know Wallabies Are Playing Tomorrow After AFL But Before The NRL — The Betoota Advocate
Posted in Uncategorized

Rugby’s Marketing Pigeon Assures Boss That Punters Know Wallabies Are Playing Tomorrow After AFL But Before The NRL — The Betoota Advocate

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The common rock pigeon tasked with running the entire marketing division of Rugby Australia has assured boss Hamish McLennan…

Continue Reading Rugby’s Marketing Pigeon Assures Boss That Punters Know Wallabies Are Playing Tomorrow After AFL But Before The NRL — The Betoota Advocate
Woman Having A Rough Go Of It Escapes Her Troubles By Playing Several Hours Of The Sims — The Betoota Advocate
Posted in Uncategorized

Woman Having A Rough Go Of It Escapes Her Troubles By Playing Several Hours Of The Sims — The Betoota Advocate

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact After having a couple of tough weeks, local woman Layla Runcorn finds herself turning towards her familiar friends again – her comfort show…

Continue Reading Woman Having A Rough Go Of It Escapes Her Troubles By Playing Several Hours Of The Sims — The Betoota Advocate
All Blacks Actually Playing Like They Come From A Dorky Little Nation Of Only 5 Million People — The Betoota Advocate
Posted in Uncategorized

All Blacks Actually Playing Like They Come From A Dorky Little Nation Of Only 5 Million People — The Betoota Advocate

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet |CONTACT In some sad news from across the dutch, our cute but dorky little cousins from the remote island state of New Zealand are…

Continue Reading All Blacks Actually Playing Like They Come From A Dorky Little Nation Of Only 5 Million People — The Betoota Advocate
Friend In Long Term Relationship Commandeers Bachelorette’s Dating Apps Like She’s Playing Hoe-kémon Go — The Betoota Advocate
Posted in Uncategorized

Friend In Long Term Relationship Commandeers Bachelorette’s Dating Apps Like She’s Playing Hoe-kémon Go — The Betoota Advocate

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact A single woman has today had to inform her friend that NO, she does not want her fucking around on her dating apps…

Continue Reading Friend In Long Term Relationship Commandeers Bachelorette’s Dating Apps Like She’s Playing Hoe-kémon Go — The Betoota Advocate
Archaeologists Discover Last Pub TV Playing Chive TV — The Betoota Advocate
Posted in Uncategorized

Archaeologists Discover Last Pub TV Playing Chive TV — The Betoota Advocate

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT Researchers from the Royal Betoota College of Human Sciences have announced an exciting new finding today, after discovering what it believed…

Continue Reading Archaeologists Discover Last Pub TV Playing Chive TV — The Betoota Advocate
NRL To Achieve Dream Of Hosting Origin Overseas By Playing Game 2 In Perth — The Betoota Advocate
Posted in Uncategorized

NRL To Achieve Dream Of Hosting Origin Overseas By Playing Game 2 In Perth — The Betoota Advocate

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT The National Rugby League is believed to be patting itself on the back this evening, after successfully expanding the code into…

Continue Reading NRL To Achieve Dream Of Hosting Origin Overseas By Playing Game 2 In Perth — The Betoota Advocate