"Lets Get Deep-Dish Haha" Says The Bigfella — The Betoota Advocate
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“Lets Get Deep-Dish Haha” Says The Bigfella — The Betoota Advocate

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A young large unit from out town’s aspirational Heights area cast his vote for deep-dish pizza over the weekend,…

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Bitter Scam Artist Who Didn’t Get Business Upgrade Lets One Rip On Way Through To Cattle Class — The Betoota Advocate
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Bitter Scam Artist Who Didn’t Get Business Upgrade Lets One Rip On Way Through To Cattle Class — The Betoota Advocate

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A bitter bloke has decided to dish out his own twisted brand of justice this morning, after failing to score himself…

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Local Girl Lets Colleagues Know She Needs The Most Emotional Support By Lugging 20L Jerry Can To Work — The Betoota Advocate
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Local Girl Lets Colleagues Know She Needs The Most Emotional Support By Lugging 20L Jerry Can To Work — The Betoota Advocate

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT Litres of sloshing water can be heard cascading through the hallways of KPMG Betoota this morning, as a local girl faces…

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New Year Smoothie Routine Binned After Local Girl Lets Noxious Shaker Ferment In Handbag All Weekend — The Betoota Advocate
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New Year Smoothie Routine Binned After Local Girl Lets Noxious Shaker Ferment In Handbag All Weekend — The Betoota Advocate

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A New Year’s resolution is in tatters this morning after a local girl has discovered the downsides of embracing a juice…

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'Oi Let's Catch Up Before Work Starts' Just Code For 'Lets Suck As Much Piss As Possible, Today' — The Betoota Advocate
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‘Oi Let’s Catch Up Before Work Starts’ Just Code For ‘Lets Suck As Much Piss As Possible, Today’ — The Betoota Advocate

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT With a vast majority of Australians returning from their Christmas break and back into to work over the next week, the purgatory of…

Continue Reading ‘Oi Let’s Catch Up Before Work Starts’ Just Code For ‘Lets Suck As Much Piss As Possible, Today’ — The Betoota Advocate
"Let's Put On Some Reggae Haha" Says Mate Who Hasn't Roasted One In A While — The Betoota Advocate
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“Let’s Put On Some Reggae Haha” Says Mate Who Hasn’t Roasted One In A While — The Betoota Advocate

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT A group of friends in their 30s are winding back the clock tonight as the group pothead pulls out a joint that’s big…

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Local Girl Lets Colleagues Know She’s Still Jenny From The Block Blending Air Force 1s with Fitted Blazer — The Betoota Advocate
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Local Girl Lets Colleagues Know She’s Still Jenny From The Block Blending Air Force 1s with Fitted Blazer — The Betoota Advocate

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A local corporate has unleashed a personal rebrand this morning, as she undertakes a mission to let her colleagues know she’s…

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A Federal Corruption Watchdog Is Not A Bad Shout, And I'm All For It, And Yes, If Any Of These Bastards Are Lining Their Own Pockets Then I Have No Problem Seeing Them Swing, But Before We Go And Grab Our Pitchforks, We Really Should Come To A General Consensus On What That Word 'Corruption' Actually Means, Particularly In Queensland, Ya Know My Mentor Sir Joh Was Always Written Off As Corrupt, But Really At The End Of The Day, Without Those Completely Unregulated Post-War Investments Flowing In From Japan, And All Those Comically Crooked Tender Processes, We Wouldn't Have The Gold Coast, Now Would We? Let's Not Forget The 1982 Commonwealth Games, A Real Coming Of Age For Brisbane... Mind You, I Do Find It Completely Pointless To Host A Gymnastics Event Without Any Chinese Or Russians Athletes Flying Around The Mat. But Nevertheless, It Was A Real Highlight For Brisbane. With No Help From Down South Either. I've Always Said That Those Lilypad Lefties At The ABC Cannot Tell The Difference Between Full Blown White Collar Crime And Something As Innocent As Immigrant Ambition. So A Couple Of Old Krauts Got Paid Out The Arse For A Job That Coulda Been Done For Half The Price? Who Cares? The Job Got Done Didn't It? Who Do You Think Built These Bloody Railroads That Carried Us Through Multiple Mining Booms? Overpaid Ethnic Men, That's Who. Proud Lutheran And Orthodox Men With Surnames Like Hinze, Thiess, Cilento. Or Those Mad Deen Brothers. My Goodness They Used To Make Me Laugh. Good Muslim Lads Who Could Weave A Demolition Wrecking Ball Through Even The Most Precious Heritage Listings. This Country Was Built On The Back Of People Like That. Innovative And Aspirational Queenslanders. Unflinching Patriots. Titans Of Industry That Prefer To Ask For Forgiveness Rather Than Permission — The Betoota Advocate
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A Federal Corruption Watchdog Is Not A Bad Shout, And I’m All For It, And Yes, If Any Of These Bastards Are Lining Their Own Pockets Then I Have No Problem Seeing Them Swing, But Before We Go And Grab Our Pitchforks, We Really Should Come To A General Consensus On What That Word ‘Corruption’ Actually Means, Particularly In Queensland, Ya Know My Mentor Sir Joh Was Always Written Off As Corrupt, But Really At The End Of The Day, Without Those Completely Unregulated Post-War Investments Flowing In From Japan, And All Those Comically Crooked Tender Processes, We Wouldn’t Have The Gold Coast, Now Would We? Let’s Not Forget The 1982 Commonwealth Games, A Real Coming Of Age For Brisbane… Mind You, I Do Find It Completely Pointless To Host A Gymnastics Event Without Any Chinese Or Russians Athletes Flying Around The Mat. But Nevertheless, It Was A Real Highlight For Brisbane. With No Help From Down South Either. I’ve Always Said That Those Lilypad Lefties At The ABC Cannot Tell The Difference Between Full Blown White Collar Crime And Something As Innocent As Immigrant Ambition. So A Couple Of Old Krauts Got Paid Out The Arse For A Job That Coulda Been Done For Half The Price? Who Cares? The Job Got Done Didn’t It? Who Do You Think Built These Bloody Railroads That Carried Us Through Multiple Mining Booms? Overpaid Ethnic Men, That’s Who. Proud Lutheran And Orthodox Men With Surnames Like Hinze, Thiess, Cilento. Or Those Mad Deen Brothers. My Goodness They Used To Make Me Laugh. Good Muslim Lads Who Could Weave A Demolition Wrecking Ball Through Even The Most Precious Heritage Listings. This Country Was Built On The Back Of People Like That. Innovative And Aspirational Queenslanders. Unflinching Patriots. Titans Of Industry That Prefer To Ask For Forgiveness Rather Than Permission — The Betoota Advocate

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT After a long election campaign of promising to lock up crooked politicians, The Australian government is set to introduce its long-awaited Federal Corruption…

Continue Reading A Federal Corruption Watchdog Is Not A Bad Shout, And I’m All For It, And Yes, If Any Of These Bastards Are Lining Their Own Pockets Then I Have No Problem Seeing Them Swing, But Before We Go And Grab Our Pitchforks, We Really Should Come To A General Consensus On What That Word ‘Corruption’ Actually Means, Particularly In Queensland, Ya Know My Mentor Sir Joh Was Always Written Off As Corrupt, But Really At The End Of The Day, Without Those Completely Unregulated Post-War Investments Flowing In From Japan, And All Those Comically Crooked Tender Processes, We Wouldn’t Have The Gold Coast, Now Would We? Let’s Not Forget The 1982 Commonwealth Games, A Real Coming Of Age For Brisbane… Mind You, I Do Find It Completely Pointless To Host A Gymnastics Event Without Any Chinese Or Russians Athletes Flying Around The Mat. But Nevertheless, It Was A Real Highlight For Brisbane. With No Help From Down South Either. I’ve Always Said That Those Lilypad Lefties At The ABC Cannot Tell The Difference Between Full Blown White Collar Crime And Something As Innocent As Immigrant Ambition. So A Couple Of Old Krauts Got Paid Out The Arse For A Job That Coulda Been Done For Half The Price? Who Cares? The Job Got Done Didn’t It? Who Do You Think Built These Bloody Railroads That Carried Us Through Multiple Mining Booms? Overpaid Ethnic Men, That’s Who. Proud Lutheran And Orthodox Men With Surnames Like Hinze, Thiess, Cilento. Or Those Mad Deen Brothers. My Goodness They Used To Make Me Laugh. Good Muslim Lads Who Could Weave A Demolition Wrecking Ball Through Even The Most Precious Heritage Listings. This Country Was Built On The Back Of People Like That. Innovative And Aspirational Queenslanders. Unflinching Patriots. Titans Of Industry That Prefer To Ask For Forgiveness Rather Than Permission — The Betoota Advocate
Rubber Arm Accountant Says “Fuck It” And Lets Chippy Claim $500 Massage Gun As Work Expense — The Betoota Advocate
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Rubber Arm Accountant Says “Fuck It” And Lets Chippy Claim $500 Massage Gun As Work Expense — The Betoota Advocate

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A professionally dubious Accountant is being praised today, after turning a blind eye to some low level tax fraud. Working late…

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"How's This For Ya Offshore Wind Albo" Laughs Local Dad As He Lets One Rip In The Tinnie — The Betoota Advocate
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“How’s This For Ya Offshore Wind Albo” Laughs Local Dad As He Lets One Rip In The Tinnie — The Betoota Advocate

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Prime Minister Albanese is under fire this week from the sons and daughters of fishing and boating enthusiasts, for teaching their dads the…

Continue Reading “How’s This For Ya Offshore Wind Albo” Laughs Local Dad As He Lets One Rip In The Tinnie — The Betoota Advocate