Tag: Laugh

Nation’s Men Do The Washing Up Today, For A Treat And A Laugh  — The Betoota Advocate
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Nation’s Men Do The Washing Up Today, For A Treat And A Laugh  — The Betoota Advocate

 Author: Stephen Bailey  Published Date: March 8, 2023

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT March 8 marks International Women’s Day, a date where 90% of businesses appreciate 50% of the population for 0.003% of the year.  The…

Continue Reading Nation’s Men Do The Washing Up Today, For A Treat And A Laugh  — The Betoota Advocate
"Surprise Surprise" Laugh Nation's Parents As Marie Kondo Reveals She's Given Up On Tidying — The Betoota Advocate
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“Surprise Surprise” Laugh Nation’s Parents As Marie Kondo Reveals She’s Given Up On Tidying — The Betoota Advocate

 Author: Stephen Bailey  Published Date: January 30, 2023

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT In some inevitable news which comes as a surprise to no one in particular, Marie Kondo has revealed that ‘she’s kind of given…

Continue Reading “Surprise Surprise” Laugh Nation’s Parents As Marie Kondo Reveals She’s Given Up On Tidying — The Betoota Advocate
Katter Says He Was Completely Unaware That Anybody Had Problem With The Melbourne Cup Unless It’s Some Sort Of Intellectual Reaction To The Snobby Attitudes Of Those Patch-On-Elbow Blue Bloods At Victorian Racing I Mean It’s No Wonder These Kiwi And Arab Horses Keep Winning The Bloody Thing When There’s No Active Push To Include Homegrown Horses I Mean If You Wanna See A Real Race You Should You Head To The Windorah Gymkhana Out There In The Barcoo, Mind You She Was Lucky To Get A Start This Year Due To This Unseasonal Downfall That Always Makes It A Bit Dangerous To Be Riding Rank Station Ponies At Full Pelt In A Pair Of RMs and Molekskin Trousers, I Always Remember The First Time My Boy Robbie Tried To Jump In The Saddle For The Trot-Canter-Gallop Event When He Was A Young Fella, You See He’d Borrowed This Mare From My Mate Bucktooth Toovey Out The Back Of Isisford Anyway He’s Halfway Through This Race And Looking Alright Actually, About To Change Gears For The Sprint Until This Sand Goanna Comes Out Of Nowhere And Spooks The Poor Thing To High Heavens, My Son Robbie, Fresh From The Cowboys Young Guns Squad, After Getting Dropped For Playing Like A Girl Just Quietly, Gets Thrown Like A Cannonball Into A Crowd Of Rum-Swilling Ringers Who’d Come To Town For A Look, Well That’s What I Thought Anyway, Turns Out A Few Of Them Were What You’d Describe As Motorcycle Enthusiasts, The Type Of Blokes You’d Rather Miss And Land On A Cactus, Now Robbie Knew As Well As I Do That As A Cleanskin Politician His Old Man Can’t Be Getting Involved In Any Disputes With These Kind Of Outlaws, So I Sent In A Couple Of Brophy’s Tent Boxers Who Were Making Light Work Out Of The Shandy Bar Round The Corner, These Blokes Come Steaming Through Like The Burgess Brothers And By Joh You Shoulda Seen The Blue The Boys Put On, I Mean I Shouldn’t Laugh, But We Definitely Still Do Behind Closed Doors Over Christmas, I Had To Make A Lot Of Election Promises To Soothe Things Over With The Committee After That One But The Locals Still Reckon Those Tickets Were The Best Money Ever Spent
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Katter Says He Was Completely Unaware That Anybody Had Problem With The Melbourne Cup Unless It’s Some Sort Of Intellectual Reaction To The Snobby Attitudes Of Those Patch-On-Elbow Blue Bloods At Victorian Racing I Mean It’s No Wonder These Kiwi And Arab Horses Keep Winning The Bloody Thing When There’s No Active Push To Include Homegrown Horses I Mean If You Wanna See A Real Race You Should You Head To The Windorah Gymkhana Out There In The Barcoo, Mind You She Was Lucky To Get A Start This Year Due To This Unseasonal Downfall That Always Makes It A Bit Dangerous To Be Riding Rank Station Ponies At Full Pelt In A Pair Of RMs and Molekskin Trousers, I Always Remember The First Time My Boy Robbie Tried To Jump In The Saddle For The Trot-Canter-Gallop Event When He Was A Young Fella, You See He’d Borrowed This Mare From My Mate Bucktooth Toovey Out The Back Of Isisford Anyway He’s Halfway Through This Race And Looking Alright Actually, About To Change Gears For The Sprint Until This Sand Goanna Comes Out Of Nowhere And Spooks The Poor Thing To High Heavens, My Son Robbie, Fresh From The Cowboys Young Guns Squad, After Getting Dropped For Playing Like A Girl Just Quietly, Gets Thrown Like A Cannonball Into A Crowd Of Rum-Swilling Ringers Who’d Come To Town For A Look, Well That’s What I Thought Anyway, Turns Out A Few Of Them Were What You’d Describe As Motorcycle Enthusiasts, The Type Of Blokes You’d Rather Miss And Land On A Cactus, Now Robbie Knew As Well As I Do That As A Cleanskin Politician His Old Man Can’t Be Getting Involved In Any Disputes With These Kind Of Outlaws, So I Sent In A Couple Of Brophy’s Tent Boxers Who Were Making Light Work Out Of The Shandy Bar Round The Corner, These Blokes Come Steaming Through Like The Burgess Brothers And By Joh You Shoulda Seen The Blue The Boys Put On, I Mean I Shouldn’t Laugh, But We Definitely Still Do Behind Closed Doors Over Christmas, I Had To Make A Lot Of Election Promises To Soothe Things Over With The Committee After That One But The Locals Still Reckon Those Tickets Were The Best Money Ever Spent

 Author: Stephen Bailey  Published Date: October 31, 2022

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT With less than 24 hours until the Race That Stops The Nation, the same hashtags that once dominated social media before the pandemic…

Continue Reading Katter Says He Was Completely Unaware That Anybody Had Problem With The Melbourne Cup Unless It’s Some Sort Of Intellectual Reaction To The Snobby Attitudes Of Those Patch-On-Elbow Blue Bloods At Victorian Racing I Mean It’s No Wonder These Kiwi And Arab Horses Keep Winning The Bloody Thing When There’s No Active Push To Include Homegrown Horses I Mean If You Wanna See A Real Race You Should You Head To The Windorah Gymkhana Out There In The Barcoo, Mind You She Was Lucky To Get A Start This Year Due To This Unseasonal Downfall That Always Makes It A Bit Dangerous To Be Riding Rank Station Ponies At Full Pelt In A Pair Of RMs and Molekskin Trousers, I Always Remember The First Time My Boy Robbie Tried To Jump In The Saddle For The Trot-Canter-Gallop Event When He Was A Young Fella, You See He’d Borrowed This Mare From My Mate Bucktooth Toovey Out The Back Of Isisford Anyway He’s Halfway Through This Race And Looking Alright Actually, About To Change Gears For The Sprint Until This Sand Goanna Comes Out Of Nowhere And Spooks The Poor Thing To High Heavens, My Son Robbie, Fresh From The Cowboys Young Guns Squad, After Getting Dropped For Playing Like A Girl Just Quietly, Gets Thrown Like A Cannonball Into A Crowd Of Rum-Swilling Ringers Who’d Come To Town For A Look, Well That’s What I Thought Anyway, Turns Out A Few Of Them Were What You’d Describe As Motorcycle Enthusiasts, The Type Of Blokes You’d Rather Miss And Land On A Cactus, Now Robbie Knew As Well As I Do That As A Cleanskin Politician His Old Man Can’t Be Getting Involved In Any Disputes With These Kind Of Outlaws, So I Sent In A Couple Of Brophy’s Tent Boxers Who Were Making Light Work Out Of The Shandy Bar Round The Corner, These Blokes Come Steaming Through Like The Burgess Brothers And By Joh You Shoulda Seen The Blue The Boys Put On, I Mean I Shouldn’t Laugh, But We Definitely Still Do Behind Closed Doors Over Christmas, I Had To Make A Lot Of Election Promises To Soothe Things Over With The Committee After That One But The Locals Still Reckon Those Tickets Were The Best Money Ever Spent
Optometrist Endures Another Gruelling Appointment Trying Not To Laugh At Patient In The Refractor — The Betoota Advocate
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Optometrist Endures Another Gruelling Appointment Trying Not To Laugh At Patient In The Refractor — The Betoota Advocate

 Author: Stephen Bailey  Published Date: October 21, 2022

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Betoota Heights Optometrist, Kieran Colmslie is shining a light on the lesser-known pressures facing professionals like him. Speaking to The Betoota Advocate today,…

Continue Reading Optometrist Endures Another Gruelling Appointment Trying Not To Laugh At Patient In The Refractor — The Betoota Advocate
A Federal Corruption Watchdog Is Not A Bad Shout, And I'm All For It, And Yes, If Any Of These Bastards Are Lining Their Own Pockets Then I Have No Problem Seeing Them Swing, But Before We Go And Grab Our Pitchforks, We Really Should Come To A General Consensus On What That Word 'Corruption' Actually Means, Particularly In Queensland, Ya Know My Mentor Sir Joh Was Always Written Off As Corrupt, But Really At The End Of The Day, Without Those Completely Unregulated Post-War Investments Flowing In From Japan, And All Those Comically Crooked Tender Processes, We Wouldn't Have The Gold Coast, Now Would We? Let's Not Forget The 1982 Commonwealth Games, A Real Coming Of Age For Brisbane... Mind You, I Do Find It Completely Pointless To Host A Gymnastics Event Without Any Chinese Or Russians Athletes Flying Around The Mat. But Nevertheless, It Was A Real Highlight For Brisbane. With No Help From Down South Either. I've Always Said That Those Lilypad Lefties At The ABC Cannot Tell The Difference Between Full Blown White Collar Crime And Something As Innocent As Immigrant Ambition. So A Couple Of Old Krauts Got Paid Out The Arse For A Job That Coulda Been Done For Half The Price? Who Cares? The Job Got Done Didn't It? Who Do You Think Built These Bloody Railroads That Carried Us Through Multiple Mining Booms? Overpaid Ethnic Men, That's Who. Proud Lutheran And Orthodox Men With Surnames Like Hinze, Thiess, Cilento. Or Those Mad Deen Brothers. My Goodness They Used To Make Me Laugh. Good Muslim Lads Who Could Weave A Demolition Wrecking Ball Through Even The Most Precious Heritage Listings. This Country Was Built On The Back Of People Like That. Innovative And Aspirational Queenslanders. Unflinching Patriots. Titans Of Industry That Prefer To Ask For Forgiveness Rather Than Permission — The Betoota Advocate
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A Federal Corruption Watchdog Is Not A Bad Shout, And I’m All For It, And Yes, If Any Of These Bastards Are Lining Their Own Pockets Then I Have No Problem Seeing Them Swing, But Before We Go And Grab Our Pitchforks, We Really Should Come To A General Consensus On What That Word ‘Corruption’ Actually Means, Particularly In Queensland, Ya Know My Mentor Sir Joh Was Always Written Off As Corrupt, But Really At The End Of The Day, Without Those Completely Unregulated Post-War Investments Flowing In From Japan, And All Those Comically Crooked Tender Processes, We Wouldn’t Have The Gold Coast, Now Would We? Let’s Not Forget The 1982 Commonwealth Games, A Real Coming Of Age For Brisbane… Mind You, I Do Find It Completely Pointless To Host A Gymnastics Event Without Any Chinese Or Russians Athletes Flying Around The Mat. But Nevertheless, It Was A Real Highlight For Brisbane. With No Help From Down South Either. I’ve Always Said That Those Lilypad Lefties At The ABC Cannot Tell The Difference Between Full Blown White Collar Crime And Something As Innocent As Immigrant Ambition. So A Couple Of Old Krauts Got Paid Out The Arse For A Job That Coulda Been Done For Half The Price? Who Cares? The Job Got Done Didn’t It? Who Do You Think Built These Bloody Railroads That Carried Us Through Multiple Mining Booms? Overpaid Ethnic Men, That’s Who. Proud Lutheran And Orthodox Men With Surnames Like Hinze, Thiess, Cilento. Or Those Mad Deen Brothers. My Goodness They Used To Make Me Laugh. Good Muslim Lads Who Could Weave A Demolition Wrecking Ball Through Even The Most Precious Heritage Listings. This Country Was Built On The Back Of People Like That. Innovative And Aspirational Queenslanders. Unflinching Patriots. Titans Of Industry That Prefer To Ask For Forgiveness Rather Than Permission — The Betoota Advocate

 Author: Stephen Bailey  Published Date: September 26, 2022

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT After a long election campaign of promising to lock up crooked politicians, The Australian government is set to introduce its long-awaited Federal Corruption…

Continue Reading A Federal Corruption Watchdog Is Not A Bad Shout, And I’m All For It, And Yes, If Any Of These Bastards Are Lining Their Own Pockets Then I Have No Problem Seeing Them Swing, But Before We Go And Grab Our Pitchforks, We Really Should Come To A General Consensus On What That Word ‘Corruption’ Actually Means, Particularly In Queensland, Ya Know My Mentor Sir Joh Was Always Written Off As Corrupt, But Really At The End Of The Day, Without Those Completely Unregulated Post-War Investments Flowing In From Japan, And All Those Comically Crooked Tender Processes, We Wouldn’t Have The Gold Coast, Now Would We? Let’s Not Forget The 1982 Commonwealth Games, A Real Coming Of Age For Brisbane… Mind You, I Do Find It Completely Pointless To Host A Gymnastics Event Without Any Chinese Or Russians Athletes Flying Around The Mat. But Nevertheless, It Was A Real Highlight For Brisbane. With No Help From Down South Either. I’ve Always Said That Those Lilypad Lefties At The ABC Cannot Tell The Difference Between Full Blown White Collar Crime And Something As Innocent As Immigrant Ambition. So A Couple Of Old Krauts Got Paid Out The Arse For A Job That Coulda Been Done For Half The Price? Who Cares? The Job Got Done Didn’t It? Who Do You Think Built These Bloody Railroads That Carried Us Through Multiple Mining Booms? Overpaid Ethnic Men, That’s Who. Proud Lutheran And Orthodox Men With Surnames Like Hinze, Thiess, Cilento. Or Those Mad Deen Brothers. My Goodness They Used To Make Me Laugh. Good Muslim Lads Who Could Weave A Demolition Wrecking Ball Through Even The Most Precious Heritage Listings. This Country Was Built On The Back Of People Like That. Innovative And Aspirational Queenslanders. Unflinching Patriots. Titans Of Industry That Prefer To Ask For Forgiveness Rather Than Permission — The Betoota Advocate
Relatable Aussie Larrikin Has A Laugh At Himself For Hilariously Undermining Nation's Democracy — The Betoota Advocate
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Relatable Aussie Larrikin Has A Laugh At Himself For Hilariously Undermining Nation’s Democracy — The Betoota Advocate

 Author: Stephen Bailey  Published Date: August 19, 2022

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The nation’s former Prime Minister has today proven that he’s still got it. After a barrage of criticism for deliberately undermining the nation’s…

Continue Reading Relatable Aussie Larrikin Has A Laugh At Himself For Hilariously Undermining Nation’s Democracy — The Betoota Advocate