“Oh They Were SOOO Good at Splendour” Says Local Girl After Every Song — The Betoota Advocate
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“Oh They Were SOOO Good at Splendour” Says Local Girl After Every Song — The Betoota Advocate

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A Hottest 100 house party is pumping in the French Quarter this afternoon, as a rabble of young revellers tune in…

Continue Reading “Oh They Were SOOO Good at Splendour” Says Local Girl After Every Song — The Betoota Advocate
Local Girl Who Can’t Be Assed Shaving Her Legs Fends Off Potentially Boring Date By Playing The Gastro Card — The Betoota Advocate
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Local Girl Who Can’t Be Assed Shaving Her Legs Fends Off Potentially Boring Date By Playing The Gastro Card — The Betoota Advocate

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A local girl is glad to have won back her Friday night after skillfully playing the oldest trick in the book….

Continue Reading Local Girl Who Can’t Be Assed Shaving Her Legs Fends Off Potentially Boring Date By Playing The Gastro Card — The Betoota Advocate
Girl Who Used To Hiss At Substitute Teachers Now Competes At Weekend Powerlifting Comps — The Betoota Advocate
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Girl Who Used To Hiss At Substitute Teachers Now Competes At Weekend Powerlifting Comps — The Betoota Advocate

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A Brisbane man’s commute to the city has become mildly more interesting this morning, as he tunes into the local news…

Continue Reading Girl Who Used To Hiss At Substitute Teachers Now Competes At Weekend Powerlifting Comps — The Betoota Advocate
Local Girl Lets Colleagues Know She Needs The Most Emotional Support By Lugging 20L Jerry Can To Work — The Betoota Advocate
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Local Girl Lets Colleagues Know She Needs The Most Emotional Support By Lugging 20L Jerry Can To Work — The Betoota Advocate

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT Litres of sloshing water can be heard cascading through the hallways of KPMG Betoota this morning, as a local girl faces…

Continue Reading Local Girl Lets Colleagues Know She Needs The Most Emotional Support By Lugging 20L Jerry Can To Work — The Betoota Advocate
New Year Smoothie Routine Binned After Local Girl Lets Noxious Shaker Ferment In Handbag All Weekend — The Betoota Advocate
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New Year Smoothie Routine Binned After Local Girl Lets Noxious Shaker Ferment In Handbag All Weekend — The Betoota Advocate

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A New Year’s resolution is in tatters this morning after a local girl has discovered the downsides of embracing a juice…

Continue Reading New Year Smoothie Routine Binned After Local Girl Lets Noxious Shaker Ferment In Handbag All Weekend — The Betoota Advocate
Local Girl Updates Dating Profile With Cute Sparkler Snap From New Years Eve — The Betoota Advocate
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Local Girl Updates Dating Profile With Cute Sparkler Snap From New Years Eve — The Betoota Advocate

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A dating app overhaul is underway in a French Quarter lounge room this evening as a group of housemates help a…

Continue Reading Local Girl Updates Dating Profile With Cute Sparkler Snap From New Years Eve — The Betoota Advocate
Local Girl Politely Swerves Friend's Idea To Buy $300 NYE Tickets To Drink Lukewarm Prosecco On A Rooftop — The Betoota Advocate
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Local Girl Politely Swerves Friend’s Idea To Buy $300 NYE Tickets To Drink Lukewarm Prosecco On A Rooftop — The Betoota Advocate

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact When it comes to New Years Eve, there are typically four options: A. You’re invited to a house party (the best option, but…

Continue Reading Local Girl Politely Swerves Friend’s Idea To Buy $300 NYE Tickets To Drink Lukewarm Prosecco On A Rooftop — The Betoota Advocate
Girl On Ps Drives Long Into The Night So No One Will See Her Park — The Betoota Advocate
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Girl On Ps Drives Long Into The Night So No One Will See Her Park — The Betoota Advocate

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT A girl with a new found freedom has quickly turned into a rider in the night. As someone from a big family, Zelda…

Continue Reading Girl On Ps Drives Long Into The Night So No One Will See Her Park — The Betoota Advocate
Turbulent Situationship Reaches Breaking Point As Local Girl Drops The C-Word — The Betoota Advocate
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Turbulent Situationship Reaches Breaking Point As Local Girl Drops The C-Word — The Betoota Advocate

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A fleeting situationship appears to have entered its third and final round this evening, after a local Betootanese couple fail to…

Continue Reading Turbulent Situationship Reaches Breaking Point As Local Girl Drops The C-Word — The Betoota Advocate
Katter Says He Was Completely Unaware That Anybody Had Problem With The Melbourne Cup Unless It’s Some Sort Of Intellectual Reaction To The Snobby Attitudes Of Those Patch-On-Elbow Blue Bloods At Victorian Racing I Mean It’s No Wonder These Kiwi And Arab Horses Keep Winning The Bloody Thing When There’s No Active Push To Include Homegrown Horses I Mean If You Wanna See A Real Race You Should You Head To The Windorah Gymkhana Out There In The Barcoo, Mind You She Was Lucky To Get A Start This Year Due To This Unseasonal Downfall That Always Makes It A Bit Dangerous To Be Riding Rank Station Ponies At Full Pelt In A Pair Of RMs and Molekskin Trousers, I Always Remember The First Time My Boy Robbie Tried To Jump In The Saddle For The Trot-Canter-Gallop Event When He Was A Young Fella, You See He’d Borrowed This Mare From My Mate Bucktooth Toovey Out The Back Of Isisford Anyway He’s Halfway Through This Race And Looking Alright Actually, About To Change Gears For The Sprint Until This Sand Goanna Comes Out Of Nowhere And Spooks The Poor Thing To High Heavens, My Son Robbie, Fresh From The Cowboys Young Guns Squad, After Getting Dropped For Playing Like A Girl Just Quietly, Gets Thrown Like A Cannonball Into A Crowd Of Rum-Swilling Ringers Who’d Come To Town For A Look, Well That’s What I Thought Anyway, Turns Out A Few Of Them Were What You’d Describe As Motorcycle Enthusiasts, The Type Of Blokes You’d Rather Miss And Land On A Cactus, Now Robbie Knew As Well As I Do That As A Cleanskin Politician His Old Man Can’t Be Getting Involved In Any Disputes With These Kind Of Outlaws, So I Sent In A Couple Of Brophy’s Tent Boxers Who Were Making Light Work Out Of The Shandy Bar Round The Corner, These Blokes Come Steaming Through Like The Burgess Brothers And By Joh You Shoulda Seen The Blue The Boys Put On, I Mean I Shouldn’t Laugh, But We Definitely Still Do Behind Closed Doors Over Christmas, I Had To Make A Lot Of Election Promises To Soothe Things Over With The Committee After That One But The Locals Still Reckon Those Tickets Were The Best Money Ever Spent
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Katter Says He Was Completely Unaware That Anybody Had Problem With The Melbourne Cup Unless It’s Some Sort Of Intellectual Reaction To The Snobby Attitudes Of Those Patch-On-Elbow Blue Bloods At Victorian Racing I Mean It’s No Wonder These Kiwi And Arab Horses Keep Winning The Bloody Thing When There’s No Active Push To Include Homegrown Horses I Mean If You Wanna See A Real Race You Should You Head To The Windorah Gymkhana Out There In The Barcoo, Mind You She Was Lucky To Get A Start This Year Due To This Unseasonal Downfall That Always Makes It A Bit Dangerous To Be Riding Rank Station Ponies At Full Pelt In A Pair Of RMs and Molekskin Trousers, I Always Remember The First Time My Boy Robbie Tried To Jump In The Saddle For The Trot-Canter-Gallop Event When He Was A Young Fella, You See He’d Borrowed This Mare From My Mate Bucktooth Toovey Out The Back Of Isisford Anyway He’s Halfway Through This Race And Looking Alright Actually, About To Change Gears For The Sprint Until This Sand Goanna Comes Out Of Nowhere And Spooks The Poor Thing To High Heavens, My Son Robbie, Fresh From The Cowboys Young Guns Squad, After Getting Dropped For Playing Like A Girl Just Quietly, Gets Thrown Like A Cannonball Into A Crowd Of Rum-Swilling Ringers Who’d Come To Town For A Look, Well That’s What I Thought Anyway, Turns Out A Few Of Them Were What You’d Describe As Motorcycle Enthusiasts, The Type Of Blokes You’d Rather Miss And Land On A Cactus, Now Robbie Knew As Well As I Do That As A Cleanskin Politician His Old Man Can’t Be Getting Involved In Any Disputes With These Kind Of Outlaws, So I Sent In A Couple Of Brophy’s Tent Boxers Who Were Making Light Work Out Of The Shandy Bar Round The Corner, These Blokes Come Steaming Through Like The Burgess Brothers And By Joh You Shoulda Seen The Blue The Boys Put On, I Mean I Shouldn’t Laugh, But We Definitely Still Do Behind Closed Doors Over Christmas, I Had To Make A Lot Of Election Promises To Soothe Things Over With The Committee After That One But The Locals Still Reckon Those Tickets Were The Best Money Ever Spent

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT With less than 24 hours until the Race That Stops The Nation, the same hashtags that once dominated social media before the pandemic…

Continue Reading Katter Says He Was Completely Unaware That Anybody Had Problem With The Melbourne Cup Unless It’s Some Sort Of Intellectual Reaction To The Snobby Attitudes Of Those Patch-On-Elbow Blue Bloods At Victorian Racing I Mean It’s No Wonder These Kiwi And Arab Horses Keep Winning The Bloody Thing When There’s No Active Push To Include Homegrown Horses I Mean If You Wanna See A Real Race You Should You Head To The Windorah Gymkhana Out There In The Barcoo, Mind You She Was Lucky To Get A Start This Year Due To This Unseasonal Downfall That Always Makes It A Bit Dangerous To Be Riding Rank Station Ponies At Full Pelt In A Pair Of RMs and Molekskin Trousers, I Always Remember The First Time My Boy Robbie Tried To Jump In The Saddle For The Trot-Canter-Gallop Event When He Was A Young Fella, You See He’d Borrowed This Mare From My Mate Bucktooth Toovey Out The Back Of Isisford Anyway He’s Halfway Through This Race And Looking Alright Actually, About To Change Gears For The Sprint Until This Sand Goanna Comes Out Of Nowhere And Spooks The Poor Thing To High Heavens, My Son Robbie, Fresh From The Cowboys Young Guns Squad, After Getting Dropped For Playing Like A Girl Just Quietly, Gets Thrown Like A Cannonball Into A Crowd Of Rum-Swilling Ringers Who’d Come To Town For A Look, Well That’s What I Thought Anyway, Turns Out A Few Of Them Were What You’d Describe As Motorcycle Enthusiasts, The Type Of Blokes You’d Rather Miss And Land On A Cactus, Now Robbie Knew As Well As I Do That As A Cleanskin Politician His Old Man Can’t Be Getting Involved In Any Disputes With These Kind Of Outlaws, So I Sent In A Couple Of Brophy’s Tent Boxers Who Were Making Light Work Out Of The Shandy Bar Round The Corner, These Blokes Come Steaming Through Like The Burgess Brothers And By Joh You Shoulda Seen The Blue The Boys Put On, I Mean I Shouldn’t Laugh, But We Definitely Still Do Behind Closed Doors Over Christmas, I Had To Make A Lot Of Election Promises To Soothe Things Over With The Committee After That One But The Locals Still Reckon Those Tickets Were The Best Money Ever Spent