Tag: Friends
Group Of Asian Friends Has Random White Guy Who Seems To Know Everything About Every Meal And Every Pop Band To Come Out Of Asia
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Local gweilo, Jeremy Eggman has once again blown away his greater social circle with his bizarre artillery of facts about their own…
Friend’s Easy Going Boyfriend Allowed Into The Inner Sanctum Of Very Explicit Girl Chat — The Betoota Advocate
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact A woman’s golden retriever boyfriend has found himself invited into a space few straight men are allowed into, after his girlfriend, Lisa’s mates…
Financial Risk Analyst Calculates The Number Of Friends He’ll Lose If He Keeps Being Such A Tight-Arse — The Betoota Advocate
RORY SALAZAR | Finance | Contact 26 year old financial risk analyst, Crox Prue, was up until 2am this morning identifying and analysing potential risks that threatened the financial…
Advice Column | How To Deal With Your Cunty Friends Who Have Money Now — The Betoota Advocate
RORY SALAZAR | Finance | Contact With money here in Betoota flowing harder than Niagara Falls, some friends can’t help but go troppo when they get cashed up. Their…
Woman Visiting Male Friend’s House Forced To Use Washing Up Liquid After Failing To Find Any Hand Soap — The Betoota Advocate
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact A local woman has this weekend been horrified to discover that her male friends may have a little to desire in the hygiene…
Local Girl Politely Swerves Friend’s Idea To Buy $300 NYE Tickets To Drink Lukewarm Prosecco On A Rooftop — The Betoota Advocate
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact When it comes to New Years Eve, there are typically four options: A. You’re invited to a house party (the best option, but…
Local Girl Uses Friend’s Lavish Engagement Party to Hard Launch New Boyfriend — The Betoota Advocate
KEITH T. DENNETT | Editor | CONTACT A local Betoota girl has capitalised on a rather swanky engagement party, using the extravagant occasion to officially ‘Hard Launch’ her new…
Woman With Hectic Dating Schedule Helps Friends Keep Track By Using Very Descriptive Nicknames — The Betoota Advocate
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact A local bachelorette has thoughtfully come up with a strategy to help her friends keep track of her dating life, by employing the…
Bob Katter Tells Albanese To Just Say The Word And We Can Begin Nationalising The Energy Grids, It Can Be Swift, And It Can Be Bloodless, Unless They Want Otherwise. My Son Robbie And I Can Take Care Of Any Power Stations North Of The Brisbane Line, And Don’t You Dare Think For One Minute That The Proud People Of North Queensland Adhered To The 1996 Firearms Agreement, Because We Didn’t. We’ve Got Caches Of High-Powered Weapons Buried In Container Units Right Across The Gulf, And When We Liberate The Grid, You Can Tell Those Greedy Bastards At Telstra And The Commonwealth Bank That We’re Coming For Them Next. Australians Built These Institutions, And We Can Take Them Back, By Force If Need Be, And Let Me Just Say I Hope That It Is Needed, Because Where I’m From Snakes Get The Shovel, And If This Current Crisis Tells Us Anything, It’s That There’s A Den Of Poisonous Snakes Slithering Through Boardrooms From Brisbane To Hobart. Privatisation Serves No One But The Top End Of Town, And That’s What I’ve Been Warning These Useless Fools In Canberra For Half A Century Now. They’ve Buggered It All Up, And They Know It. Our Nation’s Greatest Assets Have Been Sold At Less Than Cost Price To The Sandstone Friends Of The Ruling Class, They’d Sell Them The ABC And Australia Post If We We Weren’t Looking. But That Ends Whenever You Say It Ends, Albanese, My Dear Friend. Let ‘Em Know We Are Ready, We’ll Take Back The TAB Too While We’re At It. Because Australians Deserve The Dignity Of Knowing That Every Time They Do Their Arse On The Punt, At Least Their Losses Are Being Spent Of Fixing Roads And Hospitals, Not Some Soul Sucking Corporate Villain’s Yacht. These Blue Blooded Cowards Thought I Was Joking When I Said Australia’s Not For Sale. Well It Isn’t, And They Can Find Out The Hard Way, If That’s What They Want.
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT In the boldest act of the new Labor Government, The Australian Energy Market Operator (AEMO) has been given full support to take the…
Local Couple Slip Home Via Drive-Thru After Friends Host Minimalist Ottolenghi Dinner Party — The Betoota Advocate
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A local couple have made a small detour on the way home this evening, stopping into a chargrilled chicken establishment for…