Tag: Free
Baker Confirms Gluten Free Bread Always Has Holes In It Because That’s Where The Gluten Used To Be — The Betoota Advocate
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact Though local woman Gwen Bennett [34] had expected the odd few wrinkles there have been a few parts of her thirties that have…
Bank Woos New Customers With Free Set Of Steak Knives For Every New Home Loan Over $750,000 — The Betoota Advocate
RORY SALAZAR | Finance | Contact The Bank of Betoota (BOB) has put the rest of the Big Five on notice this morning after it created a paradigm shift…
Luxury Property Seller Distressed At Only Making Hundreds Of Thousands Of Dollars Of Tax Free Capital Gains — The Betoota Advocate
RORY SALAZAR | Finance | Contact “Oh no. No no no!” These were the distressed mutterings heard from under Sarah Connelly’s breath earlier today after her luxury Roma Hills…
Neighbourhood’s Most Recent Divorce Tragically Civilised And Gossip Free — The Betoota Advocate
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT As a gossip drought continues to plague Bond street in Betoota Heights, the rumour that local parents Mary and Jim Boyle might be…
Bloke Still Living At Home Ready To Dish Out Some Free Financial Advice If Anybody’s Listening — The Betoota Advocate
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Some blimp-headed fuck from Betoota Heights has told friends this week that he can’t wrap his head around renting…
Queenslander Losing Qantas Lounge Virginity Stunned They’ll Let You Free Pour Your Own Bundy — The Betoota Advocate
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT Born and bred in Dalby in the Western Downs of Queensland, local fencing contractor Darren Berrigan (34) is not usually one…
Free Spirited Single Friend Has A ‘Blind Date’ Like It’s The Bloody Nineties — The Betoota Advocate
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT In what may just be her kookiest venture yet, Betootan Odette Brown (29) is going on a ‘blind date’ like it’s the bloody…
Hungover Man Impressed With Artsy Cafes Free Gift Wrapping On Bacon And Egg Roll — The Betoota Advocate
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A man who can’t remember his last name has found salvation this morning, as he resurrects himself from an insufferable hangover….
Katter Says The Key To Tackling Inflation Is A Full-Tilt Return To A Cash-Only Economy Because It Seems That Every Purchase And Sale That We Document Be That By Pen And Paper Or Through One Of Those Wicked Card Machines Eventually Ends Up On A Balance Sheet And In An Economy Like This That Kind Of Information Can Make Some Cotton-Wool Wrapped Suits At The RBA Very Nervous I Mean Say What You Want About Immigrants But They Carry With Them An Engrained Adherence To A System Where The Government Doesn’t Need To Be Looking At Every Bloody Cent We Spend, Mind You, I Do Know Of A Few Blokes That Might’ve Got Bit Carried Away, Back In The Day Some Of These New Australians Were Bloody Good At Giving Gifts I’ll Tell Ya That Much For Free, It Took A Microscope And Thousands Of Public Servants To Deduce That Our Former Premier Sir Joh May Have Been Given A Few Aeroplane Hangars Packed With Close To Ten Million Dollars Worth Of Farming Machinery For No Reason Other Than The Fact He Was A Good Bloke – Poor Joh Didn’t Think Much Of It But He Paid For It In The End
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Australians have been told to brace ourselves for even more inflation, as the international unrest of war, diplomatic break downs and natural disasters…
Optus Apologise To Customers For Extreme Privacy Breach The Only Way They Know How By Offering Free Talk And Text After 8 — The Betoota Advocate
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The capital city shitebags caught up in the Optus data hack have been offered free talk and text after…