LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
A Betoota dad became the star of his own proverb today as the selfless patriarch managed to share an objectively small problem with his whole family.
While returning home from a stressful day at work, father Brian Bramley (44) called the house and asked if someone could please open the garage door for him as he can’t find the clicker because his car is too messy.
As his three children fought over who should be the one to take this bullet, Bramley pulled into his driveway to find that his simple request had been denied and that he would have to open the garage door manually himself or call the house again and ask what exactly was going on.
Three seconds later Bramley’s wife Donna answered her husband’s phone call.
“Darl what’s going on in there, the garage door is still bloody shut!” demanded Bramley, going on as if it was raining or an actual problem.
“Do you have any idea of the day I’ve had today?”
Bramley then demanded he be put on loudspeaker so he could berate his lazy children for not bothering to do the thing their dad wasn’t stuffed to do.
“I had to deal with this bloody mental client at work today, I got a parking ticket when I was one minute over, I dropped my can of V and had to open it over the sink…”
As Bramley’s children listened with the sad helplessness of a USSR space traffic controller listening to their comrade run out of air, Donna was genuinely impressed about how her husband had managed to make his lost garage clicker the entire family’s problem.
“If he’d have cleaned his car like I told him to last weekend he’d be inside eating beef strog right now,” stated Donna, who would have found the whole thing hilarious if it wasn’t her life.
“Instead now the kids are crying and he’s sped off to KFC to weep over a greasy bucket.”
“Actually, that was probably his plan all along.”
MORE TO COME.