Pale White Boy Rocking Etnies Skate Shoes Either Computer Science Teacher or Ice Dealer — The Betoota Advocate

Pale White Boy Rocking Etnies Skate Shoes Either Computer Science Teacher or Ice Dealer — The Betoota Advocate

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT

An avid PC gamer is keeping Betoota locals on their toes this morning, given a wide berth thanks to his concerning choice of footwear.

Standing out the front of the EB Games store in Betoota Mall, it’s believed local computer science teacher Martin Herbert is lining up to purchase a fresh copy of the widely popular Elden Ring computer game.

Sporting a baggy pair of khaki cargo pants, a loose black t-shirt and a fresh pair of black Kingpin 2 Etnies skate shoes, it’s understood the majority of locals are hurrying past Mr Martin, under the impression he’s standing outside the store to deal crystal methamphetamines.

A generally reserved teacher, who doesn’t enjoy the beach and would prefer to spend his weekend deep into a Warcraft incursion, Mr Martin told our reporter he’s more than comfortable wearing a pair of shoes that are often associated with deadshit drug dealers.

“I got my first pair when I was 14 and to be honest, I don’t see a problem with them.”

“Sure the only skating I’ve ever done is on Tony Hawk Pro-Skater 4, but these trusty kicks have kept me happy for years.”

Speaking to The Advocate, whilst waiting for the video game store to open, Mr Martin said he’s disappointed that people, including his boss, continue to assume he’s selling narcotics.

“Yeah, even the School Principal pulled me aside last year and asked me to lose the Etnies and swap to some leather brogues.”

“I know they’re trying to improve the professionalism around the school, but 100% I’m stickin’ with these!”

“And no, I don’t deal drugs on the side, but if you are looking for a good deal on some illegally imported computer monitors come see me at the Betoota Book & Computer Fair next Sunday, I’ve got some HD screens that’ll really get your eyeballs spinning.”

More to come.

Author: Stephen Bailey