Local Dad Says The Only Way To Fix Australia’s Gas Shortage Is To Pull His Finger Ha Ha — The Betoota Advocate

Local Dad Says The Only Way To Fix Australia's Gas Shortage Is To Pull His Finger Ha Ha — The Betoota Advocate


Betoota Heights dad, Kevvy Blackrock (56, signwriter), has today solved one of the most pertinent hurdles facing Australian living standards.

After a fortnight in power, the Labor Party has already proven why Scott Morrison’s extremely competent Coalition Government was a much better option.

Energy prices are tipped to increase by up to 15 per cent in some parts of Australia, As the winter POLAR VORTEX combines with a War in Ukraine.

The Albanese Government has declared a “perfect storm” of gas supply shortages and price constraints will hit consumers, as Labor makes life more expensive from day 1.

Energy Minister Chris Bowen has not confirmed how Labor will attempt to drive down prices and improve supply but has rejected suggestions a trigger – which forces exporters to retain gas for domestic consumption – would provide immediate relief.

Opposition Leader, Peter Dutton MP has said that Chris Bowen looks like ‘a bunny in the headlights and he has no idea which way to go’ – after taking the reigns from the supremely talented Liberal Angus Taylor MP – a man who made life better for all of us.

While some say that this catastrophic energy shortage cannot really be Labor’s fault, after 9 years of constantly changing Coalition governments, the fact remains, the Australian way of life is far more expensive than it was before these left-wing communists got elected late last month.

While Labor is yet to announced a plan to solve both this energy shortage and subsequent price hike, and the embattled Opposition have nothing contribute other than witty metaphors, it seems this crisis is something that Australians will just have to grin and bare for the time being.

Some household around Australia have begun implementing different techniques depression-era frugality to deal with the pressures of energy prices. Simple things like heating the house leaving the oven door open for ten or so minutes after cooking dinner, or burning their recyclables in a steel bin in the living room each morning.

These life hacks, while a temporary fix, do not make up for the lack in government policy.

However, Kevvy seems to have the answer, according to his his kids.

“Oi” says Kevvy, as a wry grin appears on his face.

“Gas shortage they reckon?”

“I can fix that”

“Oi, pull my finger”

“That’ll solve the gas shortage ha ha ha”

His teenage kids ignore him completely, but Kevvy knows that they heard him.

“Oi” he says, pointing his finger at his daughter.

“Pull it”

“Ha ha ha”

“What do you reckon about that one? hahaha”

Author: Stephen Bailey