LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
Betoota man Jimmy Granger (39) has learnt that he has officially left his youth behind after catching himself casually nodding along to some jazz music.
As a living thing, Granger has been gradually getting older for his entire life with reminders coming in the form of health ailments, grey hairs and things from his youth being considered retro.
In previous years there have been musical clues that Granger is getting older, such as how he would rather listen to his own farts than triple j and increasingly finding himself frustrated by the quality of the teenage staff at Maccas.
However, it was while waiting for his morning coffee at a local cafe that Granger caught himself nodding along to counter-melodic stylings of jazz icon Thelonius Monk.
It wasn’t until Granger left the cafe with his sans KeepCup hand still clicking along to the jazzy groove that he realised the song he was listening to was not a hip hop jazz sample but a vocals-free jazz song played on actual instruments.
“Oh fuck, I’m old,” stated Granger, who prior to today couldn’t list any jazz musicians apart from Louis Armstrong and Bleeding Gums Murphy.
“That’s the end of that then. Do I go and buy a record player or a coffin?”
MORE TO COME.