Friendly Courier Has No Idea That He’s Become The Scapegoat For Office Toilet Skid Marks — The Betoota Advocate

Friendly Courier Has No Idea That He's Become The Scapegoat For Office Toilet Skid Marks — The Betoota Advocate

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT

A betrayal of the highest order has taken place in Betoota’s Old City District as an entire office comes together to blame the mess in the bathrooms on their most friendly courier. 

Known for delivering packages and smiles, An Hanh (68) is a beloved courier who services the delivery needs of Old City District PR firm Souls Aren’t Us. 

In between deliveries, Hanh is known to chat with the PR firm’s staff, refill his water bottle and bond with the office pissheads about all the horrible bets he made that weekend.

Aside from overseeing the flow of physical communications in and out of the office, Hanh is also entirely responsible for all the mess in the bathroom including glistening toilet seats and toilet bowls that look like Mount Panorama on a Monday morning.

Previously, staff of Souls Aren’t Us blamed the general population of men in the office for the poor state of the bathrooms due to the scientific fact that women do not poo.

However, for the past six or so months the men in the office have banded together and based the bulk of the blame at the hardworking feet of their favourite courier.

“Yeah, one time, I swear he was in there for like 15 minutes,” stated one Judas Iscariot, basing the lie off his own hemorrhoid inducing habits.

“I came in after and it was like someone had dumped a tin of Milo in there.”

Despite Hanh only ever using the bathrooms for a quick well-hydrated wee, the still mostly enigmatic courier will continue to shoulder the blame for the state of the toilets as long as he continues being working class in a middle class environment.

MORE TO COME.

Author: Stephen Bailey