Delusional English Mate’s Already Convinced Himself Football’s Actually Coming Home — The Betoota Advocate

Delusional English Mate's Already Convinced Himself Football's Actually Coming Home — The Betoota Advocate

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Oh no, it’s happening it again.

A local English football (soccer) fan has once again convinced himself that football is really ‘coming home’ this time around.

The expression is based off a popular English World Cup song, that claims that the English team will win, and football is coming home, to England.

Released a couple of decades ago, the Britpop hit the ‘Three Lions’ experienced a serious resurgence at the last World Cup, with the English actually managing to put up a half decent performance at a major tournament for the first time in decades.

With each win English fans began to chant louder and louder about football apparently returning home – as if the home of Football isn’t on the streets of Sao Paulo, Buenos Aires, Berlin or Rome.

The inevitable loss at the last World Cup came at the hands of Croatia in the semi-finals, before the chants began to surface again at the most recent Euros – where they got bounced by the Italians.

However, despite the fact it’s physically impossible for the English to win the World Cup (see Parramatta in the NRL, Carlton in the AFL etc), one local English fan has once again foolishly let in feelings of hope.

“It really is coming home,” said the pasty, yellow toothed man wearing an English football jersey he bought 15 years ago.

“The team we’ve got, the players, the belief, the disappointment from previous tournaments, we are ready,” he said.

“Football’s coming home.”

“Just look what we did to Iran last night.”

Author: Stephen Bailey