Cranky Old Bastard Torn Between Supporting An Aussie Underdog Or Hating Eccentric Millennial — The Betoota Advocate

Cranky Old Bastard Torn Between Supporting An Aussie Underdog Or Hating Eccentric Millennial — The Betoota Advocate

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet |CONTACT

A local pop with a conservative disposition has today revealed to The Advocate that he has a little bit too much time on his hands.

Bumping into our reporter at Manetta’s Green Grocer in the Old City District, Frank Jones informed our paper that he’s at a bit of an emotional crossroads.

The semi-retired air-conditioning installer who now has time to read The Betoota Bugle every morning before a healthy dose of Sky News during the day said he’s really struggling to deal with Nick Kyrgios’s recent run of form.

“I just wish he would fucking pull his head in,” explained Frank, torn between supporting a talented Aussie underdog who is overperforming on the world stage and tearing down an eccentric millennial who is afraid to express a bit of personality.

The cranky old boy’s comments come as Kyrgios powers into the quarter-finals, with a very winnable game against Chilean Cristian Garin on the cards for a spot in the semis at the most ‘prestigious’ tennis tournament.

“He’s so talented, I just don’t know why he can’t apply himself and not carry on every time he plays,” continued Frank who has revised history to say that Lleyton Hewitt was an immaculately behaved sportsman who was loved by his peers on the tennis tour.

“A bit of personality is fine, but he’s just too much.”

When asked about whether he’d prefer Nick win or lose going forward, the patriotic old begrudgingly admitted that he would like to see the Australian chalk up another famous win.

More to come.

Author: Stephen Bailey