Clueless Bloke Suggesting Hiking As A First Date Obviously Has Never Watched A True Crime Doco — The Betoota Advocate

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact

A clueless bloke has today fucked up by innocently suggesting hiking as a first date activity, which is not only a rather streneous way to get to know someone, but also incredibly scary for a woman.

It’s alleged Chris Hayes [25] had gotten out of a long term relationship a few months ago when he decided to take the plunge and get into dating apps, resulting in him having to learn things pretty damn fast.

As someone who was pretty much a novice when it came to dating, Chris had no idea of the unspoken rules of first dates nor would he have ever had to consider his own safety,  and he’s still stuck suggesting activities he did with his former partner, who he’d been with since he was a teenager.

Luckily, after having a little whinge about dating to his female friend, Jess, Chris has now been educated on the do’s and don’ts of organising a first date.

“For fuck sake Chris, you can’t suggest hiking!”, Jess had informed him, “first dates need to be public.”

“Why’s that?”, asked Chris, looking genuinely confused.

Looking at Chris with both a mix of annoyance and slight resentment, Jess explains that meeting a strange bloke in private is an incredibly dangerous thing to do as a woman.

“Alone, on a trail…with a big strange man who could overpower you?”

“Rocks? Cliffs? You get my drift.”

“Yeah but I wouldn’t do that though!”,Chris had argued.

Letting out a sigh, Jess tells Chris that ‘she knows that’ but  to just stick to a coffee or wine date.

“Go hiking with your mates.”

“It’s fucking boring anyway.”

Author: Stephen Bailey