Both Christians And Homosexuals Relieved To Not Hear This Bloke’s Opinion On Pride Jersey Saga — The Betoota Advocate

Both Christians And Homosexuals Relieved To Not Hear This Bloke's Opinion On Pride Jersey Saga — The Betoota Advocate


The catastrophic binfire caused by the Manly Sea Eagles media team’s attempt to be the first NRL club to wear a LGBTI rainbow jersey, appears to have simmered down today just in time for kick-off of the clunky first ever Pride Round.

This is surprising given the state of media in this country – a limping industry that exists purely to use awkward conversations around social justice as a divisive wedge between Australians who just want to get on with life.

Manly coach Des Hasler has been praised for his stellar effort putting out the culture wars fires with a clear and concise public statement on Tuesday, much to the disappointment of the NewsCorp vultures who want to turn this into an outdated debate around ‘personal freedoms’.

Hasler has confirmed the team would still wear the rainbow-coloured kit tonight, while still supporting the players who have decided to not play due to a religious stance.

While the Manly Sea Eagles had hoped to use their ‘pride’ jersey join other progressive and gay-friendly brands like Rio Tinto, Uber and the NSW Police – it seems that 7 players just don’t want to take part in this rushed execution of inclusivity.

This religious pushback, which is likely caused by a whispering pastor who is weaponising devout footballers as a tool in the culture wars, has just kind of been accepted – as both the club and the NRL vow to continue education around LGBTI advocacy amongst their players.

However, despite the clear division between the happy clappers and the gays, it’s positive to know that in 2022 this kind of conversation can happen quickly and respectfully.

This may be because Scott Morrison, a man who pioneered divisive cultural politics to further his own career, is no longer Prime Minister.

While they don’t agree on that much, today it can be confirmed that both the Homosexuals and the Christians have united in their shared relief over not having to watch Scott Morrison pour petrol on the fire.

“It’s just such a weight off our shoulders knowing this goose won’t be allowed anywhere near a microphone anymore” says Father Rodriguez from Betoota’s Catholic Church.

“He would have used this to distract from himself for the next fortnight.”

“It takes a remarkable level of incompetence for a Christian Prime Minister to lose the support of Christians. But here we are”

Local homosexual, Andy Lavender (43, upholsterer) from Betoota’s French Quarter says he agrees with the Priest wholeheartedly.

“Absolutely. Imagine the shit this bloke would be pulling out of his arse if he was still relevant”

“It really says something that this whole thing has blown over without me having to hear the words ‘PC Police’ once this week”

Author: Stephen Bailey