Best Mate’s Little Brother Way Better Value Than Best Mate — The Betoota Advocate

Best Mate's Little Brother Way Better Value Than Best Mate — The Betoota Advocate


A recent report by all the lads has found that Bozza’s younger brother, Bomber, has actually grown into a real cracker of a bloke.

This comes after the young fella came steaming into the pub on Saturday afternoon and absolutely roasted all of his older brother’s mates with classic banter while drilling schooners.

Once pigeon-holed as the annoying little shit who always wanted to play XBox with the older boys, Bomber has since developed into somewhat of a sicko fun boy – while still retaining his little shit smart mouth.

After holding court for close to half on hour, Bomber treats these ‘stupid old fucks’ with several ripping yarns about the deranged shit he gets up to with the degenerates mates that everyone remembers pumping in a backyard football.

As the night wears on, it becomes clear to everyone at the table that Bomber is their ticket out of this dump, and begin gently asking him what the plans are for this evening, before the young fella goes on to detail his intentions to ingest as much lager as possible and heading to a suburban bowling alley to cut watch some local revheads cut hoops in the car park with their unregistered and highly modified mid-1990s Commodores, before making his way to a secret warehouse party inside an abandoned milk factory.

While no one is saying it, the general consensus appears to be that the older boys will be joining this young bull for whatever the fuck he has planned – unless, you know, he thinks they might cramp his style.

However, Bomber makes it clear that anyone is welcome to ride the lightning with him tonight, as long as they don’t kill the vibe by talking about stupid podcasts or politics.

This generosity, which is actually now bordering on charity, has been met with kind smiles from the veterans – as it becomes clear that maybe Bomber is the best value of these two equally lippy clowns.

This new development is not lost on the older brother Bozza, who has joined his mates in urging that Bomber pull up a stool with them – knowing he has a magnetic effect on the local girls who would otherwise not look twice at this table of whispy beards and fading sleeve tattoos.


Author: Stephen Bailey